"There are several sacred things in this world that you don't *ever* mess with. One of them happens to be another man's fries. Now, you remember that, and you will live a long and healthy life." - Louis

"It allows me to seriously aggravate a situation without actually changing the course of history. It also stings like a bitch." - Carl

"Pizza Cong comes with us. Get him on his feet, I'll get Tricky Dick." - Louis

This is a classic. Sure its a brother movie and sure one of these dudes is a total and complete maniac, and sure the other made a ton of classics and then completely disappeared, but none of that takes away from a movie about two garbagemen who want nothing more than to open a surf shop someday. But if they don't figure out what to do after getting themselves into their biggest jam yet, they may wind up surfing their way into jail. I tried to sound like I was the guy who was reading the card for 80s trailers just now. "surfing their way... into JAIL." Emilio Estevez, Charlie Sheen, and Chainsaw from SUMMER SCHOOL as "Pizza Man" in MEN AT WORK!!!

So this one begins with our two heroes, Carl and James, two garbagemen with big dreams of getting out of the garbage racket by next year. They hate their jobs and don't really take it very seriously. I gather this by the way they throw the garbage cans everywhere. Their boss busts their chops for it, but its "cop movie sergeant" laughable. A secondary storyline where some businessman is after a local politician is happening as well. There are 2 local cops who dislike our boys as well as 2 reggae dipshit competing garbagemen who are out to embarrass our boys as well.
One night Carl is spying on his hot neighbor and see who he thinks is her boyfriend beating on her. Its her boss and its a misunderstanding but anyway, Carl shoots him in the ass with a pellet gun. This is the local politician. He gets iced that night unbeknownst to the boys by some thugs working for the scummy local businessman. The boys come back from the weekend of trashing cans and their boss sends his crazy vietnam vet brother'in'law (?)(I think) to accompany and evaluate them. The boys try their best to keep him off their backs to little avail. Suddenly they come across the body of the dude that Carl shot with the pellet gun and think that he's dead because of them. Instead of going to the cops, they keep the body (WEEKEND AT BERNIE'S style) and take it around with them until they can figure out what to do with it.

So they decide to investigate by sending Carl over to meet the lady. He poses as a neighbor and becomes romantically involved with him. They find out she has a tape that the goons were supposed to get from the politician. That means they'll be back. Louis (the vet) and James order a pizza while waiting and when he thinks the pizza man sees too much, Louis kidnaps him. So now James, Louis, the pizza man, and the stiff end up following the girl and Carl and trying to get away from the goons. The girl and Carl are stuffed in toxic waste cans (which is what the whole movie ends up being about in the first place- this businessman's toxic waste) and the other crew gets pulled by the bike cops. Louis pulls the pellet gun on them and ties them in their underwear together on a playground.
So now its up to Carl and James to rescue the girl, rescue them all once they're caught, and clear their names, all the while dodging more cops, goons, and coworkers who rig up lockers that spray shit all over you. I'm into this movie. It's dumb, but its pretty great. Maybe I like it because I watched it back when it came out. I don't know. I have a lot of fond memories of having cable with HBO and The Movie Channel in my room when I was a kid. Should you see it? Its not essential, but if you like reggae soundtracks and funny dude type flicks, you'll dig it.

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Bad/Awesome Flixxx Review: Men at Work (1990)